Dreamlining

 

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Unbelievable,  2013 is about to finish! For most of us each year seems to go faster. This year was a busy one for me: starting my consulting practice, as well as an aromatherapy company, it really took a lot of my time. Between those two activities and writing my blogs, I learned that I really need to pay attention to my plans and dreams, if I want to achieve  them. I used to think that dreams and plans were mutually exclusive, but this year I had the chance to focus on my dreams and see them take form. I am still early in the process, and it’s clear to me that it IS a process and it will take time, but I feel confident and excited about them.

 

 

 

It seems yesterday when I started my vision board for a class. In the years before I had only written affirmations of what I wanted to achieve, but having a vision board helped me to see the big picture. So, today I want to invite you to start dreamlining: writing a plan for your dreams. To start, all you need is a dream, which of course is easier to say than do actually do it. We’ve been forced to settle and to forget about our dreams in order to fit in society; we need to start dreaming again, remembering what we wanted to do when we were younger and what we feel would give meaning to our lives.

 

LET’S WORK! As Timothy Ferris says in his book The 4-Hour Workweek, the best way to start is to think: -What would you do if there were no way you could fail? -What would you do, day to day, if you had $100 million in the bank? This is about doing, but you also should consider something about being and something about having.  To help you explore your dreams, describe: One place to visit One thing to do before you die One thing to do daily One thing to do weekly One thing you’ve always wanted to learn Then, look for a board or a notebook where you can put your vision board. Visioning is a powerful exercise and it will help you to keep your eyes on the goal. Once that you’re done with the dreaming part, it’s time to start planning it. When do you want to reach your goals? how much will it cost? what investment do you need to make? what are the first steps you need to take? As this planning process is overwhelming (you should be aiming for something amazing, remember Disraeli’s words: Life is too short to be small), you may want to start with the next, minimal, elegant step. Then write down the next step, and the ones you will take in the next week. Ferris recommends to determine three steps for a 3 months and 6 months dreamlines. As he says, the objective is to define the end goal and build momentum with the critical first steps.

Life will find its way to help you achieve your goals, so you might as well plan and dream big!

Feel free to share your goals here in the comments or contact me directly if you have any questions.

Manifesting your dreams

Some days ago someone asked about the differences between a fantasy and manifesting our dreams.  For me a fantasy is not guided, it’s something that happens in our mind without thinking. It’s an expression of our desires but it is very unlikely to happen in real life.

Manifesting, on the other hand, is a tool you can use to achieve our dreams. It helps your wish, idea or dream to come to life. Manifesting may sound weird, unusual or even esoteric to you, but it has very real components. In Jungian psychology, that component is called Synchronicity, the tendency of the universe to  create patterns (Eastern philosophies call it Tao). Synchronicity, as Jean Shinoda Bolen defines it, is a descriptive term for the link between two events that are connected through meaning,  a link that cannot be explained by cause and effect.

Manifesting something is spiritual work that happens along with your physical work. This means that although some things may just “appear” in your life, you likely need to work to achieve most of your dreams.

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How do you do it?

The steps for manifesting are deliberated and precise:
*Dream/envision what you want – create a mental picture
*Use spoken words to define your ideal situation – taking care of not putting limits to the Spirit and or describe how things will happen
*Trust the Spirit –  You know that what you asked for will be granted, and you behave as if you have it already, as this is where your energy is focused
*Understand that you are an expression of the Divine and interconnected with everything and everyone. You deserve what you want and know that this is a world of abundance
*Repeat the affirmation for some time every day (I do it for a month) until it resonates within you
*Finally, keep this process private (do not share it with others, as this will “dilute” your energy) and let go!

Working with affirmations has to be aligned with what happens in your day-to-day life. It means that if I’m affirming that I want to be promoted at work, I need to show up and do my best. If I want to lose weight, I need to eat in a healthy way and exercise.  Affirmations are not a “magical substitute” for work but rather the work that our minds and spirit do to support us in reaching our goals and make the process easier. Affirmations are one of the sources of these amazing “coincidences” that happen from time to time.

What is the different between using affirmations or not?

When you use affirmations the Spirit knows what you want. As a friend of mine says, you don’t go to a store and simply say: I don’t want purple curtains. You have to say what you want!

Each person holds different beliefs about this topic, my opinion is that the best way to achieve something or receive a gift from the Universe is being very clear on what we want. Even if you don’t believe that the Spirit or the Universe provide you with what you need, you know that you receive millions of stimuli every day and your mind needs to know  which ones are relevant for you and focus on them. Perhaps you haven’t paid attention to the gifts you have received in this way yet.

LET’S WORK

Write down a simple affirmation, something that you would like to happen by the end of next month: could be a work-related goal, a personal one, something you truly would like to achieve. Put it on the mirror, your reader, as a reminder in your computer or wherever you find it every day. Repeat it for at least the rest of the month or until you achieve it.  Then, be thankful and give something back; the Universe loves gratitude.  Prepare to be amazed by the results!

Our inner voice

A great advice I heard about parenting is: Watch the words you use with your kids, as it will later become their inner voice.

I spent over 10 years fighting against the judgement I received when I was growing up. And although in the process of doing it, I acquired and honed more knowledge and skills, I also acquired fears and self-doubt. A lot of the habits I have now, are consequence of what my inherited inner voice tells me.

During the last decade, I have seen how amazing people – people I thought were incredibly gifted – felt unsure, flawed or irrelevant.  And in the same way that Prof. Chamine explains, I had the opportunity to reflect on how important it is for happiness and success, to recover our self-esteem.

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To prevent sabotages in our lives, we need to pay attention to our inner voice and encourage our sage to speak up. We cannot just ignore these voices, we need to understand what they’re telling us and where are they coming from and then address them.

LET’S WORK!

As we know, the knowledge is useless if it doesn’t impact our actions, so, I’d like to invite you write down the 3 most important things that have been sabotaged by your inner critics.

Now, add the 3 usual messages your inner critic (or saboteur) says to you.  Identify what’s the intention of this critic and the emotion behind it. Now, think of what someone who you admire would say to encourage you. Finally say these words to yourself as often as you needed them.

Here is an example of one of them:

Situation: I’m  creating an online course that will be part of my signature program.

Critic voice: Don’t even worry doing this. It’s a lot of work and no one will buy it.

Intention: I’m self-doubting, I don’t want to risk myself.

Emotion: Fear

Positive Message:  You have something positive to share. This work will inspire people to change and inspire you to take more challenges!

Take action and get rid of your inner critics, you can get the life you want!

The Change Process

The map is not the territory but, God, it helps!

Lacking clarity is one of the first obstacles to change. We face the unknown every single day, but we tend to approach life in very small steps that allow small room to chaos. We try to predict outcomes and we plan in consequence. However, there are moments when we don’t really have a clue. We’re totally lost and are not sure about what the next steps are, what we might need or how to ask for help.

Changes are not always voluntary and easy. When we feel forced to change we might feel we’re losing something. This model,  based on the Kübler-Ross model of transition dealing with loss, considers the productivity and morale that will go down during the change process and will go back to normal once that the team/person are committed again to the change. Of course, the different stages are not rigid, and may vary in duration for different people. 

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However, the curve is not so simple, it usually looks like this: 

© 2000 / 3 JM Fisher.

Most of the change management model talk about this curve. Project Managers and Change Management specialists know that more than 70% of the change initiatives will fail if they don’t have enough support through change.

We know that people may move from anxiety to hope or happiness and then descend into fear, guilt and sadness because of the loss, and that these feelings will probably hinder the change process.

Each person may experience different emotions at different pace. Each change process is also different. Depending on what is happening in their lives, people may start another curve and go deeper in these negative emotions.

Understanding the process makes easier going through it. This is why is important to reach out for help or at least support when we’re dealing with difficult changes in our lives.

In a future post, we’ll discuss how to move through the different stages and how to move forward to acceptance instead of staying stuck in depression or hostility.

But, for now, remember that you’re not alone. If you’re feeling sad, lost or unaccomplished, or think that you won’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, you need to remember that each project that is worth doing, takes time, energy and courage.